As many of you know, I appear on The Jennifer Fulwiler Show (SiriusXM Channel 129) a few times a year to talk about books for kids and teens. When I was asked by her team to help her launch her new book One Beautiful Dream, I was thrilled. In fact, I’d already pre-ordered a copy when it was on sale. Last I checked, it was still deeply discounted on Amazon and Barnes & Noble, so I recommend you grab yourself a copy before they raise it back to full price!
Title: One Beautiful Dream
Author: Jennifer Fulwiler
Genre: memoir
In this memoir, Jennifer Fulwiler recounts how she pursued her dream of becoming an author while having six kids in eight years. And in some weird way, I totally related to this book.
At first glance, many of you may wonder how can that possibly be. Jennifer and I are such opposites (and not just in height!). She was an atheist who later converted to Catholicism. I’m a cradle Catholic. She grew up as an only child in a quiet home. I grew up with four brothers in a not-always-so-quiet home. She wanted a career and no kids. I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom with a large family. She married. I didn’t. She has six kids. I have none. She now lives in a small home surrounded by the noises of a large family. I’m about to move into a sizeable condo (large enough to have my big extended Italian family over for dinner) where I will be surrounded mostly by silence except for the soft whishing of traffic from the busy street below.
How on earth could I possibly relate to this book? And not just relate to it, but thoroughly enjoy it and relish in it?
Three reasons:
- Jen and I are both workaholics who are also introverts. That means we both have to-do lists that are a mile long, but we also need time alone to recharge.
- For both of us, writing is our “blue flame.” You can read more about this in chapter 2 of her book, but basically, when we write, it’s like a fire has been lit inside us. It’s how we connect to God and his creation.
- We’ve both experienced guilt over trying to pursue our blue flames while tending to our other responsibilities.
Let me expand a bit on this third one since I think it’s crucial to my admiration for Jen’s book. Some may think that because I’m single and childless that I have gobs of time for pursuing my writing. People who really know me know that this is not true at all. My day job requires nearly 50 hours a week. On top of that, I’m pursuing a doctorate degree. These are things I need to do in order to put food on my table, to pay my mortgage, to plan for retirement, etc. When you’re single, every household responsibility falls on you.
Outside of work, I have a large extended family with thirteen nieces and nephews, which means lots of birthdays, graduations, Confirmations, First Communions, and all those other wonderful things that come with family. So even though I don’t have kids of my own, I still have plenty of kids in my life. Then I’ve got my volunteer work with the Order of Malta and my church. And I’ve got multiple circles of friends I try to keep up with.
When all is said and done, it can be hard to carve out even an hour a week during the school year in order to write. And often that hour can come with guilt. I should be cleaning my house. I should reach out to that friend I haven’t talked to in a while. I should help my aging father more. I should offer to bring something to that dinner my sister-in-law is hosting. I should grade those papers sooner rather than later. I should work more on that group project for my doctorate class.
As a workaholic, I realize I have brought most of this on myself, but that is why I appreciate Jen’s book. Through her writing, she helped me acknowledge that this is simply the way God made me and I can carve out pieces of time to pursue my blue flame precisely because that will make me a better person in all my other activities. When I write, I’m energized. A sense of order is brought back into my world for a little while. Simply put, it makes me happy. And when I’m happy, I’m a better teacher, student, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, and co-worker.
So if you’ve found yourself not pursuing your passions or if you’ve found yourself feeling guilty over pursuing your passions while trying to tend to your other responsibilities, do yourself a favor and pick up a copy of One Beautiful Dream. Then carve out a little time for your blue flame this week.